My Insecurities & B e a u t i f u l Words

  My husband writes a vision letter on how 2012 will look like by the end of the year. He writes about how his spirituality, business, physical body, social life, finances, family, his 3 daughters, and I (us) will be like by the end of 2012. This is his second year writing a vision letter, and I just had to share what he wrote about me!! It also plays in with my insecurities that I have been… I guess… dealing with? well… first off… here is the B E A U T I F U L letter he wrote about me (us).

Your relationship with your wife has been amazing! Like all marriage’s there has been ups and downs, but you are so blessed to have her in your life! She understands you, respects you, appreciates you, believes in you and stands by you 100% all the time. You have been able to keep growing each year only because of her. Olga is such a great mother with handling our 3 daughters. She is able to take care of them, keep the house clean, have food on the table for us, laundry done (which she slips a little on that, but I have seen an improvement this year) and take care of me. What a super woman! I could not have asked for a better women! I am so glad she is by my side experiencing this journey together! We have been able to implement 1 date night minimum a month and at least 1 quality time together every week! We are still madly in love with each other and those few weekend getaways to Lake Tahoe alone have been great and much needed. I could not be moving forward in life if Olga was not by my side, praise God she is, and I cant wait for our lives to be 20 years in advance when we have built our empire and we are traveling all over the world together and spending all the more quality time together!

This letter is just what I love to hear from my husband!! I love these beautiful words!!! I love to hear that I am still loved by this man who I am so deeply in love with and could not imagine my life without him! While I was reading Ray’s vision letter about me, I was surly on cloud 9, but you know, Satan tries to steer my thoughts in the wrong direction.

As you were reading this letter you seen it has my name on it, right? but, Ray’s original version did not, it just had “she.” The thoughts that come to my head were surly from Satan himself! these were the thoughts… Ray is not talking about you, he wishes it was someone else… that’s why he doesn’t write your name on it. Yeah… stupid, I know! Of course he is talking about me!! I am his wife and we have the most amazing beautiful little girls together… and… we. are. madly. in. love. with. each. other.

Satan tries to fill my head with lies! He wants to take my joy away! Satan also attacks me in my dreams. I have nightmares, often,  about Ray leaving me and that he no longer loves me and he wants to be with someone else. Satan is a BIG fat liar and this is his only way he is able to attack me, through my dreams and thoughts. He knows I am insecure about myself physically and mentally, so this is where he tries to take hold of me to believe his lies! Like I said, and will say it again, Satan is a liar! of course he wants me to believe these things, he wants what God brought together to be separated, he wants marriages to fail, he wants to see people unhappy and turn away from God. BUT, the voice of truth tells me a different story! The voice of truth says do not believe these lies! The voice of truth says, Ray and I are a power couple, and Satan knows it!! He knows that God has set Big plans for Ray and I,  All for the glory of God!!! He knows I am weak in this area and that’s where he attacks. This area of insecurity about myself I will give it to Jesus! God will surly turn it around! So, I choose to believe the truth!! God NEVER lies, God is not a liar, He can not lie!! Our God, Jesus Christ, wants us to live an extraordinary life in him!!! So, ladies, do not believe the lies that come into your head! We are wonderfully made, and God wants us to live EXTRAORDINARY!

~NUMBERS 23: 19 God is not a man, so he does not lie. He is not human, so he does not change his mind. Has he ever spoken and failed to act? Has he ever promised and not carried it through?

~JEREMIAH 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

~PSALM 139: 14 I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Wonderful are Your works, And my soul knows it very well.


Have You Heard?

  Jesus Calling… its an app! Its like receiving a txt message everyday straight from God himself! I just heard about it, not sure if its been around and most of you all ready know about it, but I just recently found out about it, and I love it! Here are two that I received and truly touched me…

December 11th

I am working on your behalf. Bring Me all your concerns, including your dreams. Talk with Me about everything, letting the Light of My Presence shine on your hopes and plans. Spend time allowing My Light to infuse your dreams with life, gradually transforming them into reality. This is a very practical way of collaborating with Me. I, the Creator of the universe, have deigned to create with you. Do not try to hurry the process. If you want to work with Me, you have to accept My time frame. Hurry is not in My nature. Abraham and Sarah had to wait many years for the fulfillment of My promise, a son. How their long wait intensified their enjoyment of this child! Faith is the assurance of things hoped for, perceiving as real fact what is not revealed to the senses.

~psalm 36:9 ~Genesis 21:1-7 ~Hebrews 11:1  

December 12th

I am taking care of you. Feel the warmth and security of being enveloped in My loving Presence. Every detail of your life is under My control. Moreover, everything fits into a pattern for good, to those who love Me and are called according to My design and purpose.

Because the world is in an abnormal, fallen condition, people tend to think that chance governs the universe. Events may seem to occur randomly, with little or no meaning. People who view the world this way have overlooked one basic fact: the limitations of human understanding. What you know of the world you inhabit is only the tip of the iceberg. Submerged beneath the surface of the visible world are mysteries too vast for you to comprehend. If you could only see how close I am to you and how constantly I work on your behalf, you would never again doubt that I am wonderfully caring for you. This is why you must live by faith, not by sight; trusting in My mysterious, majestic Presence.

~Romans 8:28 ~Job 42:1-3 ~Peter 5:7 ~2 Corinthians 5:7

 This app I believe is 9.99, but you can get a free 7 day trial!

filling your soul with Gods words is priceless! Hope these messages inspired and encouraged you as they did for me! God bless!!



I am taking my own little… much needed… retreat with me, myself, and God.

This verse has been playing on repeat in my head…
Matthew 6:33
“But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.
I will be back in a year… I mean… a week… maybe?
One more thing… this picture above has a beautiful rainbow… it reminds me of a few days ago when it was raining really hard at night and my girls got waken up by the rain banging on their window, they called out to me crying “mommy, mommy!” They were scared. I went into their room and Raychel says, “mommy pray for me!” So I prayed, “Dear Lord Jesus, protect Raychel and Oceana as they go back to sleep. Let them not be afraid, for it is just the rain tapping on their window. And Lord Jesus, if it keeps raining that we may see a rainbow tomorrow morning, in Jesus name, Amen.” Raychel -“Amen.” Raychel went right back to sleep and Oceana need me to take her too the window to see the rain before going back to sleep… so we did just that. That morning we did not see a rainbow. Raychel kept asking, “where is the rainbow, mommy?” I said, “Oh..babe, I am not sure, maybe we’ll see it some other time.”  That night as Ray and I were laying in bed I told him about how the girls were scared last night and how I prayed with Raychel and Oceana about the rain and us seeing a rainbow but that we did not see one that morning. Ray then looks over at me with these eyes saying, ” I saw a rainbow! Before going to work I seen it.” It hit both of us, that it was meant for us to have this conversation that God does answer prayers. You may say… well, there is always rainbows after it rains, but, I know deep in my heart that this was truly God hearing mine and my girls prayer!
This reminds me of one more story I would like to share and always remember. Before Ray and I had kids we drove down to LA and back. As we were driving back home Ray and I were extremely tired, but we did not want to stop, we just wanted to get home into our warm and comfy bed {I know this was not a good idea and its dangerous not only to us but to others}. We were both falling asleep as we were taking turns driving. It was so hard keeping each other awake! We were both hoping to see a Starbucks around to grab coffee but, nothing! Then after a few more miles I saw a Starbucks! I yelled to Ray, ” STARBUCKS!” Ray- “WHAT!? Really?!” He turned his head all the way back to try to see it but he didn’t and we missed the exit. When Ray turned his head back from trying to see it, he said, “Olga, When you yelled “Starbucks” I literally just finished praying to God telling him if he is really there to please show us a Starbucks!” We were both in AWE!!! And that kept us awake. God is so good, guys!! Yeah… we didn’t get a coffee, but that wasn’t the point! He was telling us that He is there that He is with us, and He does hear us {you, me, everyone!!} God is more then good!! Praise Him!
God bless!! <333333333 


  On Sunday, I woke up, got out of bed and hopped in the shower. As I was showering I felt sad, I just felt like crying. All these thoughts of little Madison still in my belly and not yet out, and how ready I am to be holding her in my arms. All last week and this past weekend all these women who I know who’s due dates are a week from mine and some even two days from mine are already holding their little ones in their arms. It started to get to me. Plus, all these other emotions I am feeling. All day Sunday I felt sad not really wanting to talk to anyone or do anything.

At church on Sunday it was my turn to watch the toddler kids, which I wasn’t really feeling up for it, but then again I didn’t want to interact with anyone and I knew the kids were not going to start a conversation with me, so I felt it actually worked out for the better. After service I hurried up to find Ray so we can head on home. I found him and we headed home. We got home, had lunch, then Ray had to head out to show some homes. Once he left I just sat there in the dinning room table watching my girls play together when all of a sudden I was feeling so sad that tears were streaming down my face. All these emotions overcoming me that there was only one thing I had/needed to do… and that was getting on my Knees! I went in my room, got on my knees and started to pray. I was telling God everything I have been feeling and for Him to come into my heart and bring me peace, patience and joy back in my heart. God is the one who truly knows my heart, and He is also the only one who knows the day and time Madison will be joining our family. His timing is always perfect! He is never late. He is never early. He is never in a hurry. He is always on time, on His time! These words I truly need to keep in my heart and always remember.

After that talk with God I felt better, relived, maybe not 100%, but better. Sometimes I feel its a good thing to feel vulnerable and emotional, because it brings me to my knees! It is also a good reminder that I cant always be strong and I need the help of our heavenly father to get me through a rough/emotional day.

I still feel a little emotional, but I am keeping these words… Gods words… close.

John 14:27 –  Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful.

Isaiah 40:31 – but those who trust in the LORD will find new strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

Matthew 11:28-30 – “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
Romans 8:15 – The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.”

Jeremiah 29:11 – For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Good Friday

~Isaiah 53:5-6

He was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed.

Romans 10:9
If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.

John 3:16
“For God loved the world so much that he gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.

~Thank you Lord for your LOVE, MERCY and COMPASSION for me. Thank you for blessing me with knowing you. Thank you for loving me for who I am. Thank you for having mercy on me when I fall constantly. Thank you for your compassion, for not only is it for me, but to everyone who believes! Thank you for the cross.

Its Friday but Sunday is coming!