are we renting our marriage or are we owning it?!

 Over the weekend I was reminded how beautiful a marriage can be and at the same time how hard it can be as well.
Are we renting our marriage or owning it?
Marriage is like owning a property or for some it’s like renting.
When we rent a property we don’t take that great care of it as if it were our own. When we rent and if something is terribly wrong with the property, what do we do? We would probably leave it and go find another. BUT, when we own our property and something goes terribly wrong, we don’t leave it and go looking for another, we stay and we do whatever it takes to fix those problems. Marriage is so similar. We should always own our marriage. We made a vow, a commitment to stay through the good times and the bad. If something goes wrong we work at it till its fixed no matter how long the process of fixing it will take, we stick with it because we own it, we are committed to it. 
 It seem like now a days we are renting our marriages and when something goes wrong we leave it and go rent somewhere else. There will always be problems whether its in this property or the next. No one is perfect. We are all unique in our own way. No two people think the same way, and that’s beautiful! Marriage is a beautiful thing, it teaches us to work together, it teaches us who we really are or who we want to be and not be. Marriage is between two people who love each other no matter how imperfect one or the other is. Marriage is two people committed to helping each other out. It’s not all just about you/me or him, its about both of us as one. 

In the end when the property is all fixed up and finished, we will love it and appriciate it all the more!

Let us change this generation and stop being renters of our marriages, lets own them!! There is power in marriages, lets keep them together!
{this of course doesn’t apply for those who are being abused physically or mentally or any other unhealthy situation}
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BIG NEWS!

Baby #4 Coming March 2013!

My Mission Field

My family is my mission field.

There is no other occupation that is sacrificial as motherhood.
Being a mom is a wonderful opportunity to live the gospel.
I have to teach my children and guide them in the right path. 
Through my girls is the starting point where I can minister to so many more people.
Being a mom is giving up yourself.

picture taken by my baby girl, Raychel!! {only reason why I’m posting it not my fave}

How can I serve somewhere else if I complain here in my own home with the people I love the most?!
This, right now, me being a mom, cleaning, picking up my girls toys for the 100th time, doing loads and loads of laundry, cooking meals, wiping noses, changing diapers, potty training, story times, disciplining, comforting, nursing, kissing boo boos, teaching and guiding my girls, and loving & helping my husband  is right where I am supposed to be!
God loves the little offerings that are done with love. These little or not so little things, do them as if doing it for the Lord. These little things are BIG things to God!! and I thank Him!! I thank you Lord for this time in my life to serve my family. You have blessed me with a beautiful family!! and I will lay myself down for them! For you have come to serve, and us as moms are setting a small example of that. Thank you, Father God. Keep keeping me focused on what matters most, setting my priorities straight!

What Women Want

 
A few days ago I posted on The Four Major Needs of a Man so, today I will share my notes on what I learned about what women want! my notes on what women want are less then the one for the man, of course 😉
First

Agian (like in the post of Mans needs), 

there are 3 major problems in marriage

1. You cant change the unchangeable
-Your spouse is the opposite of you and that is normal, you are supposed to be different
-Some needs cannot be met by another person only by God
2. When you reject your spouse needs, you are rejecting her
-Meeting needs closes doors to other temptations
-Accept your spouses needs as being valid.
-Denying her needs being met will result in an unhealthy marriage.
3. Selfishness
– Marriage is designed to die to self
-Rejecting her needs is selfish
-You are a good wife/husband till he/she says you are.
-Jesus came to serve not to be served.
-Be servants towards each other.
What Women Want
1. Security
~Be concerned, come to her world -what doesn’t bother a man bothers a women
~She needs your strength and understanding
~Be there to help
~Husbands love your wives as God loved the church
~Be a faithful provider
~Study her- want her heart
2. Soft non-sexual affection = the more sexual women become
~Romance- meeting an unspoken need
~You value her
~You care
~Emotional connection = Security
~Hold her hand, wrap your arms around her
3. Open & Honest Communication
~Detail      
~Emotional information  (It is not that she is nosey, its that she cares)
~Communicate is not just words its also feelings & emotions
~Talk with her whether you feel like it or not
~Listen/Care
~Be verbal
~Communication is oxygen to her
~Opening up = healing and re-wiring
women can fix men (their emotions or what is holding them back) if they let them
4. Leadership
(Doesn’t mean dominance)
~Women want their husbands to help…
*discipline their children
*Romance – intimate
*Finances- Budget together
*Spiritual- Pray, go to church
The definition of a HUSBAND  = a grower
husbands you can nurish (protect), feed,  mature your wife – physically, emotionally and spiritually.

well men, there you have it. now, go and put these 4 needs into practice!!

The Four Major Needs of a Man

 
 This past Saturday Ray and  I went to a marriage couples get together from our church and it was so much fun! We got to spend time with other couples and learn about husband and wife’s needs! I want to share what I learned about the four major needs of a man! These are my notes I took, and since my blog is where I document everything, I surly want to look back on this from time to time 😉 {Note: this is what I believe, and God forbid, if you are in a abusive marriage, these do not apply}

First
there are 3 major problems in marriage
1. You cant change the unchangeable
-Your spouse is the opposite of you and that is normal, you are supposed to be different
-Some needs cannot be met by another person only by God
2. When you reject your spouse needs, you are rejecting him
-Meeting needs closes doors to other temptations
-Accept your spouses needs as being valid.
-Denying his needs being met will result in an unhealthy marriage.
3. Selfishness
 – Marriage is designed to die to self
-Rejecting his needs is selfish
-You are a good wife/husband till he/she says you are.
-Jesus came to serve not to be served.
-Be servants towards each other.

The Four Major needs of a man

1. HONOR
– Praise him
-Focus on his strength not his weaknesses
-Honor is like his oxygen
-How would you treat Jesus?
-Honor your husband to where you want him to be and he will rise to that level! Believe.
– Dis-honor him and he will stay down

note: anyone can honor the perfect man.

2. SEX
-Its a force in a man
-Commit to meeting this need
-Be more sexual then you feel
-Men are visual

3. Fun & Friendship
– Is the basis of a good marriage
-Be his friend before being a mother
-Doing things with him that he enjoys makes him feel like you are still interested in him {you still like him}

4. Home Supporter
-Wife/mommy duties
-Stress free home {clean}
-Making your house a home

Have Fun Together!

The best marriage in the world is two servants in love

FindingBeautyintheOrdinary.com
For any men out there who read my blog… I will be posting what women want/need very soon, so stay tuned 😉

Sometimes it gets Worse Before it gets Better

 
  The day before Thanksgiving, Ray bought me a simple pretty necklace, and some how it got tangled up really ugly. As I try to untangle this necklace I start to get very frustrated because its not coming undone, its actually getting worse! I asked Ray, “Hey… babe? Can you please help me untangle this? I am getting very frustrated!” I then hand it over to Ray and he tries to untangle it for a while but no success. So, I go at it again. I really wanted to wear it the next day for Thanksgiving so I wasn’t going to give up.

 Again, I start to get very frustrated with it, so I began to ask God, ” God, please help me get this thing untangled!” I went back at it and that’s when I felt God saying… sometimes things/situations get worse/harder before they get better… but with my help and the peace I bring will help you through. He wasn’t necessarily talking about my necklace, but about life in general. He was teaching me through this necklace {Lord knows I am a visual and hands on learner}. As I continued to untangle this necklace I was no longer frustrated and I took my time untangling it. 3 hours later… no joke… it took me 3 HOURS to untangle this thing! But, It got untangled!! I am sure if I hadn’t felt God speaking to me, I would had totally given up! 3 hours, come on now -ha!

 The same thing goes with life troubles… things may feel like they are getting worse instead of getting better, but have no doubt, that if you trust in God and His timing, things will surly get better! He is walking beside you every step of the way, whether you feel His presence or not He is there guiding you through the process… He will strengthen you and it will get better, way better then better! Your joy will be even GREATER then your suffering/situation! This is for His Glory! Trust in Him, ALWAYS! He does the extraordinary!

Oh!! And the necklace?! I sure did wear it on Thanksgiving!! And I loved it all the more ;)… shoot 3 hours… come on now… I better have loved it all the more lol!

Blessings***

This was right at the end. This necklace was so bad it was tangled up in a ball! I am not even exaggerating, it was that bad!
 Thanksgiving Day!

For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.
-2 Corinthians 4:17

Let be and be still, and know that I am God. I will be exalted in the earth!
-Psalm 46:10 amp

I will never leave you nor forsake you… have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.
-Joshua 1:5,9

Strong Like A Palm Tree

I heard this on K-Love and had to share…   

  Have you ever seen a palm tree in the midst of a great storm? That tree may be bent so far over that it’s almost touching the ground, but when the wind finally stops, that palm tree bounces right back up. What’s interesting is that while that palm tree is hunched over under the pressure of the storm, it is actually growing stronger?

Psalm 92:12
The righteous will flourish like a palm tree, they will grow like a cedar of Lebanon;

The reason God said we’d flourish like a palm tree is because He knew there would be difficult times. He knew things would come against us to try to steal our joy and victory. God said, “You’re going to be like a palm tree because when the storms of life blow, you are going to come right back up stronger than before.” Nothing can hold you back! No weapon formed against you will prosper.

As you reflect on the events over the last year, remember, the storms you have encountered have only made you stronger. You are wiser, you are more alive, and you are headed for victory. You’re brightest days are right out in front of you! Always remember that with God on your side, nothing can hold you back!

{from here}

Have You Heard?

  Jesus Calling… its an app! Its like receiving a txt message everyday straight from God himself! I just heard about it, not sure if its been around and most of you all ready know about it, but I just recently found out about it, and I love it! Here are two that I received and truly touched me…

December 11th

I am working on your behalf. Bring Me all your concerns, including your dreams. Talk with Me about everything, letting the Light of My Presence shine on your hopes and plans. Spend time allowing My Light to infuse your dreams with life, gradually transforming them into reality. This is a very practical way of collaborating with Me. I, the Creator of the universe, have deigned to create with you. Do not try to hurry the process. If you want to work with Me, you have to accept My time frame. Hurry is not in My nature. Abraham and Sarah had to wait many years for the fulfillment of My promise, a son. How their long wait intensified their enjoyment of this child! Faith is the assurance of things hoped for, perceiving as real fact what is not revealed to the senses.

~psalm 36:9 ~Genesis 21:1-7 ~Hebrews 11:1  

December 12th

I am taking care of you. Feel the warmth and security of being enveloped in My loving Presence. Every detail of your life is under My control. Moreover, everything fits into a pattern for good, to those who love Me and are called according to My design and purpose.

Because the world is in an abnormal, fallen condition, people tend to think that chance governs the universe. Events may seem to occur randomly, with little or no meaning. People who view the world this way have overlooked one basic fact: the limitations of human understanding. What you know of the world you inhabit is only the tip of the iceberg. Submerged beneath the surface of the visible world are mysteries too vast for you to comprehend. If you could only see how close I am to you and how constantly I work on your behalf, you would never again doubt that I am wonderfully caring for you. This is why you must live by faith, not by sight; trusting in My mysterious, majestic Presence.

~Romans 8:28 ~Job 42:1-3 ~Peter 5:7 ~2 Corinthians 5:7

 This app I believe is 9.99, but you can get a free 7 day trial!

filling your soul with Gods words is priceless! Hope these messages inspired and encouraged you as they did for me! God bless!!

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